Monday, April 11, 2016

Being Strong is Hard..

The last couple days I have been really sad. Unexplainably sad.. But I put on a happy face and do what I need to do...
 Today, Riley lost his first tooth. Man, that kid has so patiently waited for this day. He has asked me several times over the last two years when that would happen and WHY hasn't it happened to him yet?!
 I was SO excited to be able to pull that thing out! Wiggly teeth seriously gross me out. As soon as it was out and we could find the tooth (it was small and it got lost in one of the rugs) he asked me to take a picture and send it to Dad! As requested, I snapped the cutest picture of my baby and off into mass messaging it went, next to instagram and by default, Facebook.
 My next step was to call Jason, like all milestones and minor events.. it's a knee jerk reaction. Only to be slapped in the face once again that he would not be there to answer.
 This Mommy lost it. Out of nowhere, I had this overwhelming wave of emotion wash over me and all I could do was cry. I cried that my baby is growing up and I cried that once again, Jason is missing out on something so minor but so big at the same time.
  I know that these posts and these feelings are all so redundant but I guess thats the way of grieving, right?
 We put on our happy faces and went to celebrate with friends for a 7 year olds party. (Thanks for being born Eizen VonArx!)

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